Catching Up

Geez am I ready for school to start.... and then I need to go on vacation without the kids.

The camping trip was fun but the kids were 'kids' and a little stressful at times. Then I spent the rest of the week at home with them.... home for 4 days and I still didn't get the floors mopped or the bath tub cleaned.... I did get the toilets done, that is a MUST every week. I went to work Friday and then off again, for the weekend.

Chuck was in a wedding Saturday, which consumed 12 hours of our day. He was busy with wedding stuff so I had the kids.... except Suze, she went to the babysitter, then mamaw picked her up.... Gracie was ok during the wedding (1 hour). The boys were a little aggravating, they kept whispering. There was a three hour lag between wedding and reception. The kids and I moseyed our way over there and hung out, munching on appetizers. It wasn't very crowded and Gracie was having fun playing with the other kids.... But there was no time for a nap on Saturday and the grouchies took over. The next five hours she was an absolute bear. NOTHING made her happy and she wanted to be held the whole time.... it was a very hot day, the building was a/c'd but once the people filed in, it got warm... ugh... Chuck and I tried to get her to dance but she insisted that one of us held her.

Sunday we laid around most of the morning. That afternoon I took the kids to a birthday party for my friend's little girl. It was outside and warm. Gracie was again not happy... in spite of the fact that she had a 2 1/2 hour nap. I was just about to give my apologies for leaving the party early when she snapped out of it. Gracie enjoyed the rest of the afternoon playing with the other kids. Chuck didn't go to the party because he had to run some errands to get stuff ready to start a roof on Monday..... which was fine with me. But when I got home I looked at him, sighed and said, "the girls need a bath!".... I got an ice cold glass of water and went to the back porch for a few minutes of silence.

For whatever reason the girls would not settle down and go to sleep Sunday night. Chuck laid Gracie down before Suze was asleep and I think that kind of added to the sleeplessness. They were quiet for a few minutes than I heard Gracie talking. I looked down the hall to see a light "On...off. On....off. On....off" I went in the room and Gracie was tapping the lamp (its a touch lamp) Suze was now wide awake and sitting up. Chuck came back in the room and we each tried to settle a child down. I finally took Gracie and put her in my bed, hoping this would help Suze settle down.

Suze would not give it up to sleep so Chuck left her to cry for a for minutes. Gracie and I laid in bed, "Shhh! Gracie lay down and close your eyes". After a few minutes of Gracie tossing and turning and Suzie crying, Gracie rolls over and looks me in the face, "Mommy, is Suzie crying because I'm not in my bed?" ......Ahhhh

Sunday night on the way home from the birthday party, Caleb asked if we (him and I) could watch a movie together when we got home.... "cuz we haven't done that in a while." .... now I really felt bad. guilt, guilt, guilt. The girls, at this age, are very time consuming; the boys are older and more self-sufficient. By the time I finish dinner, dishes, pick up toys, bathes, and get the girls in bed.... I am ready for bed myself.... I get up at 4:35... I often find myself apologizing and explaining to the boys that I don't mean to not "chill" with them very much. With the summer and them not going to bed early, I usually hit the sack before they do so I don't even tuck them in. This is my long weekend off so I intend to spend time with them.

After the past few weeks I just feel overwhelmed. I know it will all pass but for now I am exhausted