Sitting at the front of the dimly lit church, this was a day I had not looked forward to. But here it was. The large sanctuary was filling with family, friends (new and old) and some I had never met. Chuck sat next to me holding my hand, inside I was a quivering batch of jello.
A few days before the service I had suggested some songs to mom to play during visitaion. She tried to listen but was too emotionally exhausted and suggested I pick out what I thought was appropriate. There were two songs in particular that I wanted played; "I Can Only Imagine" and "Homesick". I had two Mercy Me CDs with me so I skimmed through them and picked about 7 or 8 songs.
Before the start of the service I gave my CDs and the list of songs to the sound tech.
There I sat in a hue of dark blue light surrounded by people laughing, crying, shaking hands and offering warm hugs. The songs I had selected were just loud enough to be heard over the crowd. I knew the words to most of the songs but as "Keep Singing" started to play, I found myself consciously focused on the lyrics.
Mercy Me: Another rainy day. I can't recall having sunshine on my face
Me: Even though we were in the sunny state of Florida, I felt like I was under a dark cloud
Mercy Me: All I feel is pain. All I wanna do is walk out of this place
Me: My heart pounded in my chest. The lyrics and rise in tempo made me want to jump up and run out of the church
Mercy Me: I gotta keep singing. I gotta keep praising Your name. That's the only way that I'll find healing
Me: The music slowed and eased my emotoins. The words washed over me
Mercy Me: Can I climb up in Your lap. I don't wanna leave. Jesus sing over me.
Me: With these words, tears poured from my eyes. When I was younger I had an imagine of climbing onto Jesus' lap when I was scared or hurt; like a child climbing into the lap of her father for comfort and support. Now my father lay still in the front of the church. Now more than ever I needed to climb into the lap of Jesus.
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The year following Dad's death I listened to Mercy Me every day. I slowly quit playing certain songs so often and eventually quit listening to Mercy Me.
Earlier this week I heard "Keep Singing". I wanted to write a post about the song but didn't figure I would be able to find it online since it isn't one of their more popular songs. But it just goes to prove that you can find anything on the internet.
I found two videos of the song and I picked this one because of one particular scene. Toward the end of the song there is an image of Jesus sitting in a chair with and outstretched hand.
While we were driving to Florida for Dad's funeral service, I had an image of Dad walking through the gates of Heaven. Jesus was sitting just beyond the entrance and stood when Dad walked in. As Dad walked closer, Jesus moved toward him, removing the thick velvety purple robe He wore. He took the robe and wrapped it around Dad's shoulders. Next Jesus offered Dad his chair so he could rest after his long journey home.
Mercy Me: Keep Singing
February 17, 2008
Keep Singing
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9 comments:
I have never heard that song, but it is powerful! It goes with our message this morning from Psalm 42 and 43, especially the last verse of Psalm 43 where it says "Yet will I praise you". Even in times of trouble or pain - I will still praise. Thanks so much for posting this. I had tears in my eyes reading your post and goosebumps listening to the song.
Rebekah, your remembrance of your thoughts and feelings really blessed me. I love the song - and like Mari my heart is so tender today from the message at church today. Steve talked to us about praying that abortion be abolished in our nation - he likened our nation w/Solomon and how he built altars for 2 different religions that sacrificed babies/children by fire to how the USA aborts babies and the effect it has on our country. Our forefathers never dreamed such a thing would be happening in this country. Christians really need to pray for righteous men and women be elected this fall and that He would raise someone up to lead the fight against Roe vs Wade.
Thank you Rebekah
Love Mom
I love that song. I have the CD it is on...I love Mercy Me. I want you to know, I am a blubbering mess right now. And I have to go to Roger's in about 10 minutes. My head is aching from trying to hold back the tears as I listened to that song and read your post.
I haven't lost my father, but I can so relate to your post. Sometimes (like today when I am so emotional for some reason - darned hormones or something) I just want to crawl up in my heavenly father's lap and bask in his love and protection.
Anyway, this is a beautiful post.
I am at work with tears pouring down my face. Today, I was missing my dad soo much. My friend and I were talking, and she mentioned her dad helping her with a project, and I just ached. Thanks for posting this.
what a tough day. last sunday i found myself so touched by the music i was also moved to tears. isn't it amazing how the words to songs can sometimes express exactly what we are feeling?
I always wanted to plan my own funeral as a celebration of life rather than a mourning of death. I honestly would rather think of people I know and love standing around cracking jokes and laughing about the good times they shared with me than cry or be saddened at the fact that I am gone. I've been to one such funeral, that of a close friend and unlike other friends and family that have passed, whenever I think of him, it is not his death that is the first thing to cross my mind. It is his life. There were as many smiles as their were tears and they were all on the same faces.
I'll never forget the peace that came over everyone as his mother so modestly said with her usual beautiful smile that she knew he was in heaven and what a joyful time it was for him. How could she, as a mother be sad when her son was so happy? I wept at the sight of the Military Honor Guard paying their brother such tender respect. But I don't remember any "sad" tears that day.
Someone on You Tube has put together a video in remembrance of their father. I don't know this person but I know that they must love him very much, and I know that they grieve for him in the healthiest of ways because of song they chose to accompany that video. It was the song I was searching for but I found myself mesmerized by the passing slideshow photos of a man I never knew and feeling both happy and sad at the same time for the person who so lovingly put it together.
If a song must be played at MY funeral, I couldn't think of a better one than this. I remember this song from a Stephen Curtis Chapman concert. He explained that a young child, the daughter of some dear friends, had passed away suddenly. He didn't say how. He knew he had to offer them comfort and he did it by using the gift God had given him. He wrote this song in one day and sang it for them at her funeral. What a gift.
I love this song too. I've never seen the video though. It's beautiful. Thanks for sharing it. This post is so well-written!
Rebekah, this is such a beautiful post, you have really touched me. THank you for sharing.
I still have that image of sitting in the arms of Jesus whenever I am feeling overwhelmed or sad, it is so comforting.
Your image of your father being welcomed by God into heaven is so lovely.
Hello, I just happened by your blog this evening. When my mom passed 3 years ago, the only thing that kept me going was remembering she was with Jesus. I Can Only Imagine kept me going some days and still does.
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