Since I began driving, I have always sported somewhat of a lead foot. Over the years the weight of my lead foot has increased. Mostly due to my day to day driving rut and always feeling rushed to get the kids from point A to point B......
Monday on my way home I pass a State Trooper. Looking in my rear view mirror I see him swerve onto the shoulder and prepare to turn on me. I slow way down waiting for him to catch up. As soon as he flips his lights on, I pull over. I sigh, wondering if I will get a ticket. Reaching for my registration I glance in my mirror. The Troop is wearing his campaign hat so I can't fully see his face..... Dang it! I don't think I know this guy ... 'Trooper L' walks up to my window, looks in and says, "Geeze! I can't give anyone a ticket today. I keep pulling over people I know".... well that will happen when you work in the county where you grew up ... Realizing who the Troop is I sigh again... yea! no ticket ...He tells me to slow it down and says he needs to find someone to give a ticket to. I apologize for the speed and we both go our own way.
The next morning at work I was talking about getting pulled over, "It's hard not to speed on that road!" ... It's a 16 mile stretch of open road that I drive every day ...The Detective says two words to me, "Cruise Control!".... he's probably right, I need to start using my cruise...
The very next day I was going to pick up the girls from the sitter. This is a county road that is only traveled by people going to and from their homes, or going to a specific destination. It is a rare occasion that you pass anyone, let alone a policeman. But as my lead foot was putting the hammer down I pass an unmarked cop car. "Dang! That is 'Deputy H'. I am going to get a lecture out of this." I slow down, the cop turns around and lights me up. Pulling over I roll my eyes at myself..... CRAP!! .... "That is not 'Deputy H'. That is 'Trooper B'. I am not going to get a lecture, I am going to get a ticket!!".... 'Trooper B' is a hard core-by the book officer. Would probably give his own mother a ticket ...He slowly walks up to my van and stands just behind the door post, "License and registration please." I hand him my license and began to reach for my registration. 'Trooper B' sticks his head in my window and says, "Where do you work?" I tell him and he says he thought I looked familiar. We talk for a minute and then he tells me to slow down. I apologize and mention that I need to start using cruise control. He agrees and we both go on our way.
So, on my way home yesterday I decided to put on my cruise. I am looking past the steering wheel trying to find 'cruise' on the window wiper lever. It's not there. Where is my cruise? .... DUH! Smack to the forehead ...It's on my steering wheel!
The Chief must have found out because he sent me an e-mail that said, "Congrats, Speedy!" To which I replied... full of innocence and batting eye lashes ..."What ever are you talking about?"
May 12, 2007
Not Once, But Twice
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5 comments:
Yeah, I feel you on this. My foot WEIGHS at least 75 mph!
In 1997, It was my turn to drive the carpool of guys two counties over where we attended Law Enforcement Academy. I was running late and was flying low, if you know what I mean. I saw him before he saw me and was on my brakes pretty quick. He turned around on me and before he could catch up, I was on the side of the road, car in park, hands on the steering wheel. Trooper Hulion walked up and asked me if I knew how fast I was going.
I said, "Yes sir, by the time you clocked me, I had probably slowed to about 92 miles per hour."
He said, "On the money! At least we know your speedometer works! Where are you heading in such a hurry?"
"School", I said.
"School...where?"
"OWCC in Niceville."
"At this time of the afternoon?"
Yes sir, school starts at 6:00."
"What are you going to school for?" (he already knew)
"(sigh)...we're in....law enforcement academy." (damn!)
"Ahhhhhh. Who's your instructor out there?"
(damn damn damn!!!) "ahem....Lt Bishop right now....sir."
"Lt. Ronnie Bishop?"
(oh yeah...we're screwed!) "....yes sir."
Whattaya think Ronnie's gonna say when I go back to my car, push speed dial #4 and tell him I'm writing you a speeding ticket?"
(just kill me now) "I'm uh....hoping I don't get a speeding ticket, sir." (he cracks a smile)
"They used to throw you out of the academy for getting a speeding ticket! Wonder if they still do that?" (I suddenly have the urge to urinate)
This is where I got a 10 minute lecture laced with a few cuss words and I think a comment or two about my momma. Then he let me go with the warning that I would very likely see him again.
Skip to 5 weeks later...Traffic Investigation class. New instructor. Patiently waiting in class for new instructor who is fashionably late. New instructor enters the room...Trooper....looks familiar....(damn!)
"What's up, Speedy? Told you you'd see me again, didn't I?"
True story.
you get the lead foot honestly, but I have slowed down some - and cruise control is great!! :o) I think you've heard the sotry where your Dad called me "Queenie of the hwy" and "clutch".
Love Mom
I keep waiting to get pulled over, and when I do, knowing my luck it will be highway patrol and not my agency :P The motor officer teaching our traffic laws class when I was in training for 911 told us that most officers in our city (the 5th largest in the US btw...) won't even bat at eye at you unless you are 15 mph or more above the speed limit (excepting residential streets and school zones.) I have found this to be true :P
Yep, that's what my troopers told me too. GOtta be at least 15 over...either that or driving like a maniac.
I'm a bad driver. I just want to GET there. When they invent transporters like they have on star Trek for personal use...I'm gonna be the first person in line with my money.
Zipped by a county mounty at 73 yesterday and thought I was toast for sure. But brake lights didn't even flash. So he musta been busy doing something else. WHEW!
That would NOT have been good.
Okay, I know this comment is a year late, but I just read "wadical's" comment. Do you remember Buster Ingram? He had the black Trans Am and hung out with Allen and Danny. Anyway, he had the exact same story as wadical did; he was in law enforcement training (even though he knew he would never be a cop) and late for class. He was running up the big hill on I10 in Tallahassee when he saw the hwy patrol going the other way. By the time the unit got to him he was already on the side of the road and sitting on the hood of his car with his license in his hand. He could hear the cruiser going through the gears as it was coming up the hill. When it crested the hill it must have been a surprise to see Buster there as the cruiser locked up all four tires in an effort not to pass him. Another difference is that when Buster explained about the class the trooper asked about a teacher still being a hard---. When Buster laughed the trooper smiled and said (the teacher) hates tardiness; so you better get going. And that was it. Interesting as to how similar to wadical's story. I wonder how many late for law enforcement class stories there are? You would be in the perfect position to find out!
Will
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